I didn’t plan this out…I stepped out on faith, wanting to obedient. My faith is being tested.
The site is done…now what Lord? I thought for sure the words would come, that fresh new perspective would form to be put into words…here on this virtual paper. But I find my faith is being tested.
Call it writer’s block or whatever this seems to be..my thoughts are all jumbled together and not making sense, at least not to me. What I start to write escapes me…driven away by interruptions of another starting point, just to be chased away like a loose leaf fallen from a tree, blowing on a breeze that comes out of nowhere. My faith is being tested.
Because why would the Lord have me taking the time to do something that nothing will come of? My time, energy, money…but most of all creating a sense of purpose. I sit in front of the computer with my fingers on the keys and find myself reminiscing, cutting off the fall into bad memories. Realizing my faith is being tested.
And just when I think the calm will bring the inspiration…focus on His word, His promises are sure. He didn’t bring this to you, just to leave you on the shore. Here comes the storm, stirring up the sand. Swirling all around me so that I can’t even stand. Unexpectedly, the world is on a tilt and I don’t know how this works with the time line in front of me. I can only send up a prayer and hope that God hears….because my faith is being tested.
I’d like to think my faith is secure…I’ve been through enough trials and tribulations where it was all I had to hold onto. Yet, here I am again wondering if I have what it takes to make it through once more. So forgive me if my journey takes a little pit stop, I have to find the way to regain my strength. I know where it is though…I just have to get to it because right now in this moment..this inopportune time…this unbelievably bad time…my faith is being tested.
Love you to life!
